As a neurosurgeon, Paul Kalanithi felt he'd be prepared to face his own mortality. After all, he'd helped so many of his patients do just that. But after receiving a lung cancer diagnosis, he found little of it helpful in deciding what makes life worth living in the face of death. In this TED talk, Lucy Kalanithi talks about her husband's last two years and the choices they made to improve his quality of life. They learned that living fully meant working with clinicians to meet Paul's specific needs and wishes. And that often people don't realize they have choices in medical treatment, which can start with voicing their deepest feelings. Finally, they learned "to uncover beauty and purpose both despite and because we are all born and we all die. And for all the sadness and sleepless nights. . . there is joy."